Just As I Am
I must confess that sometimes it is difficult for me to trust while struggling with difficult or challenging circumstances.
As I was preparing for our debut to teach children about the value of service dogs, things did not go as smoothly as I had hoped. As a matter of fact, I encountered huge problems with technology. My computer went absolutely haywire. Much to my dismay, it seemed I would not even be able to play the splendid video a friend produced for me showing Tanner working and playing. I was very distressed because I really wanted the children to see my special service dog in action. I spent lots of hours attempting to fix the mysterious malfunctions. Sad to say, I also wasted much emotional energy on anxiety and negative thinking.
In the midst of all the trouble however I sent many pleas for help heavenward (as well as a few requests for support from a couple of mere mortals with more expertise than I) and I am happy to report that the technical glitches were resolved. Tanner and I were able to carry out our educational session complete with slide show and video presentation.
It was a relief that the equipment worked properly. What is even more important is that I was reminded of a valuable lesson. I need to "stop allowing myself to be agitated... anxious ... or disturbed..." (See John 14:27 Amplified Bible http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=%20John%2014:27%20&version=AMP ) How much better it would have been if I would not have fretted or assumed that it was all a catastrophe.
Last evening I was with a small group of women from my church. As we were discussing valuable spiritual lessons we are learning, we reviewed recent Bible teachings. One wise women among us pointed out that we need to ask ourselves "To whom are we tring to prove something?" "We do not need to prove anything to anyone, not even ourselves", another group member stated. I realized then that perhaps I was so intense because I was trying to have a perfect performance in order to be acceptable. While there is a place for desiring excellence and wanting to give the kids and their teachers an enjoyable and informative learning experience, it is out of balance and prideful to be so fearful of a mistake because I want to impress them.
At the close of that meeting with friends from church we listened to that old hymn "Just As I Am"
Here is a link to a video of a contemporary rendition of the hymn:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37k0Yc54B2s
It is vital to remember that God does indeed love us inspite of our flaws.
As I was preparing for our debut to teach children about the value of service dogs, things did not go as smoothly as I had hoped. As a matter of fact, I encountered huge problems with technology. My computer went absolutely haywire. Much to my dismay, it seemed I would not even be able to play the splendid video a friend produced for me showing Tanner working and playing. I was very distressed because I really wanted the children to see my special service dog in action. I spent lots of hours attempting to fix the mysterious malfunctions. Sad to say, I also wasted much emotional energy on anxiety and negative thinking.
In the midst of all the trouble however I sent many pleas for help heavenward (as well as a few requests for support from a couple of mere mortals with more expertise than I) and I am happy to report that the technical glitches were resolved. Tanner and I were able to carry out our educational session complete with slide show and video presentation.
It was a relief that the equipment worked properly. What is even more important is that I was reminded of a valuable lesson. I need to "stop allowing myself to be agitated... anxious ... or disturbed..." (See John 14:27 Amplified Bible http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=%20John%2014:27%20&version=AMP ) How much better it would have been if I would not have fretted or assumed that it was all a catastrophe.
Last evening I was with a small group of women from my church. As we were discussing valuable spiritual lessons we are learning, we reviewed recent Bible teachings. One wise women among us pointed out that we need to ask ourselves "To whom are we tring to prove something?" "We do not need to prove anything to anyone, not even ourselves", another group member stated. I realized then that perhaps I was so intense because I was trying to have a perfect performance in order to be acceptable. While there is a place for desiring excellence and wanting to give the kids and their teachers an enjoyable and informative learning experience, it is out of balance and prideful to be so fearful of a mistake because I want to impress them.
At the close of that meeting with friends from church we listened to that old hymn "Just As I Am"
Here is a link to a video of a contemporary rendition of the hymn:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37k0Yc54B2s
It is vital to remember that God does indeed love us inspite of our flaws.
Comments
I work with Ben Bennett at Markeplace Chaplains, who sent me the link to your blog, which certainly speaks to me. I've almost completed 3 decades of knowing Christ and still have not learned the lesson of not fretting, even though the Lord is ALWAYS faithful to me in every situation. I think fretting can be a form of idolatry, as you say, when we place our highest priority of pleasing someone other than God. I'm grateful God loves us in Christ apart from our own merit and always forgives our confessed idolatry. Grateful for your prayer ministry with Marketplace. Dan Truitt